Tonight marks week 4 that I have been having problems sleeping. Its absolutely strange to me too cause I LOVE to sleep !! What's even more strange is you'd think that I would be sleeping better now that I have started working out and eating better, but you thought wrong. I've tried everything from sleepy time tea, to tylenol PM, taking a hot relaxing bath, my room was a disaster for the longest time and I actually cleaned it the other day thinking it would help, but sadly it didnt. I know a lot of the reason is because my mind is constantly racing and I have no method of slowing it down. I went from working 2 jobs to working none and if you know me you know that I have to CONSTANTLY be doing something in order to keep sane. I actually had an interview the other day for a position as an an assistant manager at a store in the mall which is extremely exciting, and from the note we left on it was pretty much a done deal. I have yet to hear back from them though, just kind of waiting it out. My phone was stolen the other day from the gym so in return I had to drop almost $600 on a new phone (I know ridiculous but I had to get another iPhone without an upgrade) so there went a lot of the money I had SAVED to try and move. I absolutely HATE where I live and am trying to find any loop hole I can to get out but its kind of a hard thing to do with no job. I can go on for days but I know thats not going to do any bit of good. Im just hoping for some sort of miracle to happen that will get me out of these situations and at least put me on grounds to function on. Im in no means asking for someone to take care of my problems for me, just a bit of relief. You ever have those days where you feel like no matter how hard you try your either not good enough or you just get looked passed ?? Thats exactly the way ive been feeling lately and again I have no idea why cause Im always never like that. My mind just keeps going and going and going and going and . . well you get the point. I should try harder to look past all of the negative stuff in my life and see the good but its just so hard at times. Hopefully sometime soon ill be able to get over this hump im in and start getting some god damn sleep !! Things just gotta get figured out. If you have any suggestions for me please let me know !! Im willing to try anything at this point. Love you all so much and thank you for keeping me as sane as I am right now. Back to counting sheep.
xoxo,
-Hayden
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